I officially became Mrs. O (aka Momma O)

It’s amazing to look back at what we’ve been through in the past 3 years, it’s flown by yet feels like we’ve been together forever.  I love this life! Especially now that I can enjoy it at home :-)

Happy Anniversary Mr. O!

I woke up Sunday, mentally planning my day in my head and I had a nagging feeling I had homework to do like I normally do on Sundays. Not anymore! Ever! Today is my first day “free,” a day I should be in class but instead am home like I will be for who knows how long.  Savannah got up super early this morning and so a I sipped a cup of coffee and started my day with the a reminder from the Bible about God’s stability. I sat outside at 7 am, taking turns between watching her jump in puddles and dance with a zebra umbrella while I read from a devotional and related scriptures.  Normally rainy gray days and 5:30 wake up calls would make for a grumpy mommy, but today my heart is full with gratitude and couldn’t help but see the beauty in the rain today. I saw it in the joy on her face as she stomped in puddles and squished her toes in mud. The joy in being wake to see the sky slowly light up behind the clouds. The joy in being outside before most of the neighborhood was even awake and hearing the pitter-patter rain up close and personal. I saw it in the verses I read, the reminder of God being there, a stability in life, even when I haven’ t been tuned in to Him.

Mark left for work this morning and told me, “Have a great first day of the rest of your life!” And that is exactly what today feels like. It feels like a brand new page turned, a new chapter in this life of mine.  It feels like a new beginning where I can focus on a new part of me, to be a hands-on Mom I didn’t have time to be before, the wife who can actually keep up with the dishes and laundry, a writer who can write again, a child who can actually hear the voice of God once more. I don’t know what lies ahead, I don’t know exactly what this chapter holds. I know that I have my own visions and plans, but I know also that God will “establish my steps” (Proverbs 16:9) and things will happen in His way and His time. That’s comforting.

So, here’s to the first day of the rest of my life. May it hold many beautiful things like this rainy morning.

P.S. Pregnant or know some one that is? There is a new review up (see, I have time for things again!) on “The Hot Mom to Be Handbook” by Jessica Denay.

I did it!

This was 2 weeks ago at 13 weeks. Tomorrow I am 15 weeks. Isn’t that insane?! Another month-ish and I will be half way through this pregnancy! I’m feeling absolutely fantastic.  14 weeks was the magic number and I have stopped gagging when changing diapers and opening the refrigerator (Oh, what a wonderful feeling to be free of). I have some-what more energy, but still am known to fall asleep on the couch at 8:30 some nights. The belly never goes away now and people are starting to take notice.

And? And! I’m definitely feeling little kicks and rolls now. I swear I’ve been feeling them since 10 weeks, but now the baby is stronger and it is much more obvious. I absolutely love this stage of pregnancy. Well, besides being in the in between stage of clothes, it’s always interesting getting dressed now. Who knows what won’t fit next.

Our “big” ultrasound is set for June 8th when I am 18.5 weeks. Since I’m using the midwife now I’ll be going to an separate ultrasound technician and I get cool extra stuff like 4D image, CD’s with pictures, DVD, and my family/friends have the option of watching it over the internet.  So exciting :-) It’s strange though because even though I thought for a while this may be a boy due to different symptoms and the boy looking 12 week photo, my gut is SCREAMING that it is a girl and Savannah is still insisting it’s a girl. Guess we will see soon enough and I cannot wait!

On a separate note: Yesterday was the last day of exams and I am officially d-o-n-e forever. My family arrives tomorrow and then the graduation fun happens on Saturday.  And, while I think who ever invented the traditional graduation cap and gown was insane and knew nothing about fashion, I will wear it with pride. Even if I feel silly in a square hat.

The Pregnant Woman’s Rights

1) Every woman has the right to health care before, during, and after pregnancy.

2) The right to receive care that is consistent with current scientific evidence about benefits and risks. If the practice is harmful or ineffective then it should be avoided.

3) The right to chose a midwife or doctor as her care provider.

4) The right to chose her birth setting from her safe options available.

5) The right to leave her maternity care giver if she becomes dissatisfied.

6) The right to know the qualifications of those involved in her care as well as to know when those involved are trainees.

7) The right to receive care in privacy and to have all information treated according to the standards of confidentiality.

8) The right to full and clear information about risks, benefits, and costs of any and all procedures (drugs, tests, and treatments)

9) The right to accept or refuse any treatment, drugs, or tests. She also has the right to change her mind at any time. (This one is usually only true as long as the mother or baby is not in a life or death situation.)

10) The right to be informed if she or her infant is enrolled in a research stuffy and the right to accept or deny participating.

11) The right to access any and all of her pregnancy, labor, birth, postpartum, and infant records.

12) The right to receive care that is appropriate for her culture and religious beliefs, as well as to receive information in a language she can understand.

13) The right to have any family members and friends she chooses to be present in any of her maternity care.

14) The right for advance information on risks and benefits of any and all available methods of pain relief. She has the right to refuse or accept any and change her mind at any time.

15) The right of freedom of movement during labor and the right to deliver in any position she desires.

16) The right to uninterrupted time with her newborn, so long as both she and the baby are healthy and do not need to be separated for care.

17) The right to have information on breastfeeding, to refuse any supplements or actions that could interfere with breastfeeding, as well as have access to lactation support.

18) The right to decided with the caregiver when she and the baby can go home.

I saw this on a fellow November Mommy’s blog and had to re-post it. With Kaylee I was 16 and had a great, easy pregnancy and birth. I was induced on my due date and had an epidural, pushed for an hour and the entire thing was over in about 12 hours. I assumed Savannah’s would be the same, and to an extent it was. I was induced the day after my due date, had an epidural and delivered within 12 hours again. However, with Savannah it felt different. I was only 3 years older, just 19, but I wasn’t satisfied this time with the birth. This time, I was this little girl’s mom. Not just a woman who gave her life, but her Mom. I had the choice to breastfeed her this time and start to fill that parenting role. But, I wasn’t allowed to breastfeed her right away, I didn’t get to until midnight 3 hours after her birth! This time the epidural  left my back bruised and aching for weeks, a pain far worse than where it should have been hurting. Reflecting on it over the past 3 years I realized that I wanted a birth that I was an active part in, not just laying in bed waiting for things to happen. I want it to be an empowering experience, knowing that I made it through the pain with hard work, preparation, and support.

So, I’m doing things differently this time. I’ve been seeing an obgyn until now in the pregnancy as we made sure this little guy would “stick.” I needed the ultrasounds to help calm my fears and tests to be done to help me relax. Now that I’m 14 weeks, I’m breathing a lot easier and ready to quit being just a number on a doctor’s chart. I’m tired of waiting 45 minutes to be seen for only 5 minutes, only to hear the heartbeat and then she leaves. I went to my first midwife appointment last week and we talked for an hour about my history, diet, everything. My obgyn doesn’t have time for that kind of caring, but I’m glad I’ve found some one that does!

And here’s a shocker for some people: I’m not giving birth at a hospital. No, it’s not my house, but it’s a birthing center 5 minutes away. My exams are on a twin bed with sheets rather than a stiff paper covered exam table. I’m going to labor and maybe even give birth in water. I’m not going to be induced with medicine or have an epidural. I’m going to use hypnobirthing to manage the pain. I’m going to hold my baby until I’m ready to let him go to be weighed. I’m going to breastfeed right away if he wants. I’m going to have as many people in the room as I want. I’m going home just hours after birth instead of waiting around for 2 days. I’m going to sleep in my own bed and not have nurses prodding my belly all night. I’m simply doing things much like women have successfully done for centuries and what they still do in other countries. It feels empowering already.

I’m not saying this way is the best way, everyone has their own vision of birth and what they are comfortable with. But after 2 births, I know that I personally felt something missing from the experience and this is the right choice for us this time around. I have actually been scared to tell certain people (like family) that I’m doing things differently, because using a doctor and hospital is simply standard these days and midwives are thought of as not safe (which isn’t true, do the research. It’s actually safer with way less infant mortality and c-section rates!). It’s definitely a choice that goes against the grain of society, but I’m going to take advantage of my pregnant woman’s rights and do what I feel is right for us.

The month of May will bring change, for me, for this blog, for my family. If you notice to header above, O Momma Writes has been a place “Where writing is how sanity is found amongst diapers, laundry, and homework.” Sure, I’ll still have diapers and laundry and I’ll need to find my sanity is writing as usual. But, homework? Nah. Done with that forever! So what will I do?

I can’t hold it in much longer, I’m kinda pumped about what God is doing in my life right now and the pretty clear direction it seems like He is leading me. Basically, it’s time. Time for what?

To write that book. My book.

I graduate in a week and then I’m getting down to business (er…when I get some free time outside my mommy duties that is! I’ve got lots of time to make up with Savannah since school has interfered with our relationship so much lately). I’m going to sit down and write the story that has been in my head for 6 years. I’m going to work towards my dream of being a published author. I’m going to let God guide the way with this, because I know this is one purpose He has created me for and He knows what He’s doing far more than I do. But, I can do this. With His help and others.

With 6 months before this baby comes in November, I feel like that’s a good goal to set my eyes on. The process of writing a book is pretty overwhelming to think about, but giving myself a deadline helps make it feel more tangible rather than, “Oh, I’ll get there eventually…”  No more excuses, I’m setting my eyes on this just like I did to finish college. I’m not saying it should be ready to be published or sitting out on shelves, but simply getting the story out of my head.  Then, when I’m ready (or rather, God’s ready) I can work on the publishing aspect.

And, thankfully in the past few months God has placed some people in my life so that I’m not alone as I learn about this new adventure. Tara over at The Young Mommy Life is not only a young mom, but writing a book for young moms too. She’s an inspiration and given me some tips of how to get started. Too bad Tara is in Pennsylvania though, but via email she has been amazing and she introduced me to the idea a writers group, and ta-da! God lead me to local mommy writer/blogger,  Kelli at Sustaining Creativity (she makes cute aprons too!), to start our own group. The plan is to meet a few times a month, let our girls play while we motivate each other, bounce ideas off each other, and to work towards our dream.

This morning at church (the first time in shamefully over 6 months), I felt God confirming again with the message that I am “Fearfully and Wonderfully Made” and I was made for this. I’ve always felt that my gift was in writing, especially after coming to Christ during Kaylee’s pregnancy. I’ve felt that writing is a gift that He has given for me to share with others. I felt this calling today that said, “You were tailor made for this.” And so today, I am choosing to finally have confidence in myself and in God that I’m not incompetent to write this. Sure, I don’t know what I’m doing right now, but He does. Lead the way.

So, this blog will get a make over soon, reflecting this new chapter in life. I’m a student mom for only 1 more week, then I’m putting on the hat of writer mom. I’m sure as I make some progress on this new goal in life, or need to vent about how I can’t seem to use grammar correctly I will post about it and maybe give some sneak speaks (yes, I’m an English major. Doesn’t mean I like or understand grammar! Just being honest…)

As Mama Odie says in Princess and the Frog…”This gonna be good!” I’m excited.

P.S. Hope you had a great Birthmother’s Day and Mother’s Day weeks :-D I’m sure feeling quite blessed.

This week has been a rough one. Ya know the kind. A kid wakes up sick and crying, sheets and jammies are changed, just in time to be changed again. Fun stuff. And then parents (in this case mostly Mark, he knew I had to finish school), because they spend time taking care of their precious little one, catch it too. And it’s just a domino effect. Boom, boom, boom. Everyone’s down for the count.

The stomach bug.

Especially when 13 (now 14) weeks pregnant, and you can’t keep hydrated and contractions start. Not fun. We’re all okay now (heard baby’s strong heartbeat again yesterday!), but man, I hate this stuff. Thank you GOD that it’s over.

But all this to say, I’m glad we have a little book called “The Moose with Loose Poops” because I think it helped all of us understand what’s going on in our bodies, even us 20 some year old parents. Of course, I didn’t think to pull out the parent’s guide when we were all sick, but we survived. I won the whole Dr. Hippo book series from Design {for} Baby in a giveaway several months ago and Savannah loves them even when not sick. They talk about common illnesses like cold’s, earaches, sore throats, stomach bugs, fever, in a story that helps them understand what is happening and why. We love them and their worth checking out (they are on Amazon) if you’re looking for some new kids books. It’s educational, but fun too.

On a happier note: in exactly a week I will be a graduate! Right now I will sporting a graduation cap and gown, a belly bump, and surrounded by family. So exciting to finally reach this huge milestone and goal in life :-) Just 3 exams and a portfolio standing in my way…

And an even happier note: with graduation comes a new direction.  What will I do after I graduate? Stay tuned to find out my new goal! Ya know, besides growing a healthy baby and being a great mom and wife. A goal for me.

The O Momma Recommends series is based on products that I find helpful in daily life, that I’ve discovered my self, and have not been paid or supplied the products to review.

Our 12 weeks ultrasound was this morning, it must have been baby’s nap time because he wasn’t moving much. Boo.  Still, it was nice to see tremendous growth in the past month and he looked like a baby!  Yes, he.  It must be a boy. Not just the symptoms give us clues, but this:

According to the nub theory, boy nubs point upwards, girls point more straight/perpendicular. See? Take a look at this article. It’s funny having been pregnant 3 times before I have never heard of this theory, but looking at the Ingender forum, it’s pretty accurate if you can get the right shot during an ultrasound. And, I think we got a good shot.

Ultrasound tech guessed a boy as well, guess we’ll find out officially in June!

When I was pregnant with Kaylee and Savannah, I took for granted how precious life is. I didn’t realize how easily it could slip away, how lucky I was to have two healthy pregnancies and healthy girls.

Even last year, I started out the pregnancy naively thinking everything would always be okay for me, I wasn’t one of those moms who had fertility issues. And then, my world crashed at that 8 week ultrasound. I never thought it would be me. I never thought with my super fertile body that I would lose a baby. Having a miscarriage last year has put this pregnancy in a whole new perspective. One that airs of caution more, one that prays and prays before a doctor visit hoping to hear good news.

One that prays and prays to hear that heartbeat.  The heartbeat is a sign of life, a life that my babies didn’t have last year. I’ve held onto the idea that if I just heard a strong heartbeat, this baby would be okay.

Today, I finally did hear it. Strong, fast, clear. And while I don’t think hearing that sweet heart beat will ever take away my fears completely, it certainly helps ease them. I know that this one is growing and thriving within me by that thumping noise, and praying we continue to have that confirmation.

Tuesday is an ultrasound, where I’ll not only hear the heartbeat but see my little one squirm. And hopefully, melt away my fears even more :-)

12 weeks already!

1. The nausea started earlier and more intense. I’ve cried at restaurants, just wanting to enjoy my steak, but my stomach only rumbled. I’ve spent more time gagging throughout the day than probably all my pregnancies combined.

2. As I mentioned before, smells are REALLY intense too compared to my other pregnancies. I remember some things bothering me with Kaylee and Savannah every now and then but this is, like, the entire world smells awful. Which makes me feel sick.

3. I actually threw up last night. My previous 3 pregnancies and prior to last night it has always been just nausea, but out of no where getting into bed it happened. Yuck.

4. I’ve only had boy dreams. Dreams where I’m looking at an ultrasound and they say “it’s a boy” and I always look at it like, “Are you SURE? Oh yes, I see now.” I always thought we’d have all girls, as did Mark, but my dreams usually are right about baby gender.

5. We can only agree on a girl name.  With Savannah it was the opposite, we had a boy name set (which I can’t decide if I like it or not) but not a girl’s.  Mark is fighting for the name Armanti after a football player, please tell him that it is absolutely not a good fit for our family. He better be joking…

6. Everyone says they have a “boy vibe” for me…everyone but Savannah who insists it’s a girl. And, folks, you must remember she told us “Mommy has two babies in her tummy” before we even found out there were 2 last year.

Or, maybe God is just having a laugh since I always have said, “Oh! I don’t get morning sickness bad! I can always control it by making sure I eat!” Not this time…still I know that other women have it way worse than I do and I’m grateful I haven’t reached that point.

So, I guess we’ll see in June who’s right!