Let’s back track, shall we? In Savannah’s 15 months of life, there has always been issues with sleep. When she was an infant, it was being up every 2 hours for months to nurse. Sure, the length between night awakenings got longer as the months went on, but it was pretty exhausting up until about 10 months old. Then, something seemed to click and she only wakes up one time now. But now when there isn’t excessive waking up times, there is always something else. She fights naps, she fights going to bed, she gets up way too early, or she insists that you stay in the room with her in order to sleep. Occasionally she cuts us a break to catch up on her sleep, therefore letting us catch up, and she’ll sleep heavenly for a week or two.

Like last week? Heavenly sleep, mostly. There were many nights she slept from 8pm to 8am (or even 9 am! Never had she done that before). If she woke up, it was only once and though it might have taken a while to put her back to sleep (insisting you stay in there with her), she did go back to sleep until at least 7. It was nice.

This week? We’re in hell again. The past few days she has decided that 5am is the perfect time to get up for the day, when clearly it’s not by her tired eyes and laying around (me, too). And last night? She was up at 4am. FOUR! When I went in there to give her more pain medication (she is teething, after all) she looked exhausted and laid back down, but the instant I left the room it jump started her fighting battle that has lasted well into day light. I tried everything to get her back to sleep. Rocking, swaying, walking, talking, praying, rubbing, laying down with her, etc. By an hour I was so frustrated and tense, that I put her down in her crib, walked to my room and punched a pillow. I haven’t done that since I was a kid. As much as I prayed and prayed for answers and patience, nothing came.

Finally an hour and half later Mark emailed work to say he wasn’t coming in today, and took over for me. Thank God for awesome an husband. He then did the only thing we hadn’t tried: the car.  Which, at this point, he has a minor accident backing out of our drive way into our neighbor’s parked car. See. This sleep issue is not good! All the way around!

I just don’t get why my child hates sleep? I hear that separation anxiety becomes a bigger issue around this time, so maybe that’s part of it? Plus teething? Lord, help me.

Last time we had this issue of WAY too early wake up calls, I read to move her bed earlier. And it worked, strange as it sounds. So, I think I’ll try that again, and bust out “The No-Cry Sleep Solution” book while I’m at it for other measures to take.

But, do you have any advice? Is your child (or children) as weird sleeping wise as mine? Have any stories that make me feel better and that I’m not alone?!

Some times, you’ve just got to hit play twice. I don’t do it often, but there are days where I just need a few extra minutes with my eyes closed when it’s been a rough night or an extreme early morning wake up call.  This morning was one of them as she woke up at 5:30 am and screamed and screamed from that point on. We have Baby Einstein DVD’s that are 30 minutes long. They’re educational, she loves them, and it gives me some much needed mommy time.  Alert the Bad Mommy police, I don’t care.  I’d rather her watch a few extra minutes of TV then me be in a bad mood the rest of the day…then I really would be a not so good mommy.

That sad, today I have an ultrasound on my hernia spots to see the damage.  From that we’ll know if I’ll need surgery or not. But from my last Dr. visit, it sounds like if I keep the um…digestive process…going then my hernias should be fine without surgery. So that’s good news!  We’ll see if the ultrasound confirms that today.

Also, regarding that same previous post. I did change my minor to Journalism. I’m signed up to take the intro course next semester, so hopefully it will “click” with me more than awful technical writing I’m in now.  It’s not often I dread a class this much, I generally love to learn but these projects are ridiculous!

Now I must shower while the girl is finally, finally napping (I hope).

Savannah is slowly getting better. Yesterday had it’s horrible, driving me insane moments. Sick baby = whiny baby. And that? Isn’t so much fun to listen to all day. And not to be able do simple tasks like eat, pee, and sit because she was glued to me the whole day and I had to be standing.

Thankfully, the fever seems to be gone today. But, as soon as pain medication wears off she gets whiny again, so I’m guessing she still feels achy and miserable on the inside. Poor girl. She did wake up a few times last night but get this…we all slept in until 8 am! Non-parents will not understand the true luxury of this. But for us? With a child who some times gets up at 4:00 am? 8 am is amazing.

And then. When Savannah went down for a 2 hour nap, Mark and I slept to! We’re all well rested today. It’s wonderful! And it feels so nice outside, like spring. See, I knew better days would come!

Also, if you’ve noticed I now have (tasteful) ads on the left from BlogherAds. I’m so, so excited about this! Part of the main reason I wanted to switch to my own website was to take advantage of their opportunity of putting up ads to make some kind of profit with this blog I love. Plus, I just love BlogHer and it’s a good way to promote it and other great bloggers! It’s an honor to be apart of such a great company, with other awesome bloggers and a great staff. Go check them out.

I just don’t understand why my daughter has decided sleep is the ultimate evil since about…oh…4 o’clock this morning (I’m wondering if teething is the culprit). 9 hours later she finally took a nap…a wimpy one hour nap. And now? Fighting a second nap. I guess by bed time she’ll be ready since it will be another 8 hours later from the first nap? *sigh* The good thing though, is that she’s in an excellent mood! No sleep without the whining is more manageable. But, geez, Mark and I are exhausted.

It’s been a long, long day. Thankfully, the day has been spent at home verses my usual 7 hours away at classes that was supposed to be today. Today was a snow day! But now it’s more like…a rain day because all the snow melted under the rain. Pooey.

I chose to drink out of my Wilmington, NC coffee mug today in attempt in trying to keep my spirits up as well as my eye lids from dropping over. Why? Well, that’s where Daddy O and I went on our honeymoon. And it reminded me of how wonderfully peaceful and beautiful it was there. The restaurant to the left is one we ate at, we even got to eat on a little balcony. Happy memories help, right? It worked for about 1 minute. If only we could go back to that simplistic time, ya know, away from everything, the baby, the school, the work, the laundry. And we could sleep all night on our king sized temperpedic mattress and take naps whenever we felt like!

Have I mentioned it’s been a long, blah day? I need a vacation.

 (by the way, I apologize for all my gloom and doom posts lately.  It’s just how life is right now!)

We’re back. For now, at least. We’re headed back out on the road (thankfully, only a 2 hour trip verses 7!) on Friday.  Our trip was good. The time difference of an hour threw us all off.  Savannah was scared of Maw (oh, stranger/separation anxiety!).  Savannah slept surprisingly very well, waking up only once or not at all each night. Though, she did get up early, like 5:30.  It was hard and some times frustrating to keep up with Savannah, trying to keep her entertained and contained within her small play pen and not breaking things. Over all though, it went well. I know Maw loved seeing all of us, especially Savannah! Mark had a good time with friends and family, that’s always a good thing.

Other awesomely good news: I made straight A’s this semester!  I did it! Therefore, I now have a 4.0 gpa. I’m so unbelievably proud of myself. I haven’t made straight A’s since elementary school, and I got a giant cookie back then. Where’s my cookie for this time? Just kidding, I could care less about a cookie or any other prize.  This pride I feel within myself is one of the best feelings in the world.  That pride comes from knowing that I can do things (and well) if I try.  I have had so much going on this past semester with raising Savannah, getting little sleep, sickness, long night of teething, a new marriage, traveling, endless piles of laundry, etc. and I still managed to get through school. And make all A’s! 

I think this second year in college I’ve also learned how I best learn and the best ways to study.  That, I think, is what made the biggest difference because I had little time to study this semester but I was able to do it efficiently.  I’m looking forward to next semester, though I’ll be piling on even more. With a 1st birthday to plan (already?!), a possible job, and an extra class 15 hrs. verses the 12 I had this semester) in a whole ’nother language! 3 semesters of Spanish is required for my English Degree. It baffles me. 

Off to my piles of laundry just to repack it again!  Look for our exciting news soon…

We’re in the mist of exam week. Thankfully, my “exams” are just normal tests (no cumulative horrible stuff!) and I only have two, so exam week hasn’t been too stressful. Also, Mark and I have, as I like to call it, “Christmasitis.” You know, like senioritis! When your just about at the end and you just don’t care that much any more? We’ve been studying, of course, but the stress is just not getting to us. And that makes for a happier family.

We’re ready to be done. Ready to relax for 3 weeks and enjoy visits with a ton of family. And of course, we’re ready for Christmas! I can’t wait to see Savannah’s expressions and curiosity with all the extreme amounts of paper and presents galore. I absolutely love Christmas time (though I am already sick of the repeated music). This Christmas not only is Savannah’s first, but Mark and I’s as well being actually together on Christmas. I’m excited to share my family’s traditions with him and Savannah. It’s a wonderful feeling being able to share some thing so special with people you love.

We’ve got many trips lined up for our Christmas break. It should be interesting, to say the least, what effect it has on all of us. We’ll be on the go constantly until we reach my Dad’s house, where we’ll relax the longest. Savannah has been doing absolutely amazing sleep wise lately (sleeping through the entire night, or waking up just once. A blessing indeed), so I’m sure her sleep schedule will be effected in a bad way with all the unfamiliar places. Also, laundry will be interesting since we’ll have only one day or less in between trips. We’ll be borrowing the washing machine for sure.

And baby food? The girl eats like a pig. I think we may just have to buy food at each destination so we don’t have to lug everything down there (and so when we do finally get home, we have some food left without running to the store!). We are introducing more table foods and I still make some home made baby food, (and plan to do so while I’m at my Dad’s) but the jars still have their convenience, especially on trips!

So this post in part is to tell you guys I won’t be around much for the next 3 weeks. But expect some exciting news (no, not pregnant) and tons of pictures once I return :-)

Have a wonderful Christmas everyone! (assuming I don’t find time to get on before then)

*cries* I honestly feel like I will never sleep a night again. I feel like my daughter will depend on me to put her to sleep the rest of mine/her life. I feel like we won’t have any more children because this sleep stuff? Is hell. I feel like I have the only child who defies sleep. Every other baby I know has slept from the beginning! I feel like throwing in the towel at even attempting to help change her habits, what good does it do anyway? (I know all this is totally ridiculous and won’t happen but I am seriously at the end of my limit. Once again.)

Some times this Mommy thing, just gets to me. It’s overwhelming. It’s tiring. It pushes me way past my limit and then some how brings me back again with her sweet face. But seriously? Some times? I just. Can’t. Take. It. Anymore. Today is one of those days.

I’m lost in piles of books, articles, mommy advice, a screaming child, a husband, all sorts of life demands, and no idea where to even begin.

I know I should turn all this over to God. The truth is? I have many, many times. I feel like He doesn’t hear my cry or prayers. I feel like I’m supposed to just suck it up and be patient and loving and kind and gentle (I do try, I do). But it keeps getting to me, this no sleep thing. Nothing. Works.

*sobs*

I’ve mentioned before, very briefly, that our little family lives with Mark’s parents for the time being.  With us being so young, trying to get our college degrees under our belt and not being able to devote to working full time on top of that, PLUS parenting, money is just plain tight. Therefore, the solution to living with the in-laws has worked out well. Mark and I have our own giant room. We call it our apartment. It’s pretty big with a bed room, living room and office all in one. Savannah has her own room. The only thing we don’t have is a potty or a kitchen, other wise we’d never leave (just kidding!).

Of course it’s not always a picnic, especially myself living a family that isn’t mine.  Of course they feel like family now, but it takes time (and constant practice) to learn to tolerate different ways of doing things than what I grew up with. Heck, it takes time just to feel comfy walking around in PJ’s and no make-up! But, it’s worked out and I’m (we) are very grateful for their help.

But, I think last night ultimately hit the love cord in my heart. Not that I didn’t love them before, but last night truly showed me that they really do sacrifice for us (ya know, besides watching Savannah while we’re at school all day, feeding us dinner, buying baby products when necessary, and oh ya…letting us live with them!)

You see, I pretty much haven’t slept more than 4 hours for the past week.  Starting with Savannah’s sudden teething and up all night episodes, to me picking up a cold this past weekend to now Savannah having the nasty cold, life has been a miserable, no sleep mess.  And let me just say, having a cold when all you want to do but sleep and not getting nearly enough, sucks.

I wasn’t the greatest mommy this past week, I’ll be honest.  I don’t do well without sleep.  I lost my temper easy. I wanted to cry and scream. There were some times all I could was walk out of the room with Savannah screaming and curl up in my husband’s arms begging him to wake up and help because I couldn’t take it anymore (I normally don’t because he has to get up early for work when we’re not in school, or he has an important test the next day, etc.) It’s been a rough week for everyone.  I think I looked like death as well.  I felt and looked like a zombie. I joked that with all the bags under my eyes it looked like they were going on vacation!

So finally, after pretty much 2 days straight of no sleep besides what I could scrounge between her waking up every 20 minutes after FINALLY sleeping at 1 am, my Mother in Law offered to watch Savannah during that night.  She sacrificed her own good night rest for us! Oh, it was a miracle! I went to bed at 7 pm (yes, you read that right) drugged up with cold medicine and praying my head ache would go away. I slept for 11 hours. 11 glorious hours, I had forgotten what it was like to not wake up 3 times a night. I had forgotten what waking up refreshed felt like.  Glorious indeed.

AND, she got Savannah to sleep decent.  Miracles, those Grandmoms, I tell ya. She hasn’t slept more than a stretch of 5 hours in a long time.  Granted, she held Savannah all last night but whatever works right now!

I don’t think I’ve smiled this much in a long time (due to sleep and other reasons *wink*). A good night’s sleep was greatly needed. And for that, I thank my Mother in Law. A true blessing indeed.

I really should be studying for a test coming up on Tuesday. Or, ya know, writing a paper about a play I didn’t even like. But, geez, that is so boring. And it’s the weekend! I don’t want to be boring!

Anyways, operation sleep was going good. For one whole week (or slightly more?) we got decent sleep with only 2 wakens a night, she was easy to put back down, we had our routine down pat, and even naps were on a consistent schedule. We were doing good, and I haven’t even read the whole book! All I did was keep a routine…it made THAT big of a difference. However, now we have an early riser (I’m not a morning person). But hey, I’ll take what I can get. Better sleep is better than sleeping later.

Until…teething hit. Again. This once a month teething thing is killing me. Even worse that it usually hits right when I’m PMSing. Therefore teething is to babies and their mommas, as PMSing is to wives and their husbands. Yes? It affects everyone.

Wednesday night out of no where (meaning, during the day and previous nights she’d be fine!), she was up THREE hours. 12-3am. Wouldn’t let herself sleep. So I didn’t get any sleep either, I spent my night rocking and rocking and rocking. I got 4 whole hours to be exact. This momma doesn’t do well on 4 hours, I don’t know how I made it, honestly. I figured out it was teething yesterday morning at breakfast where I discovered the swollen gums. Motrin is now my friend again. We still wake up a lot but that’s definitely better than 3 hours in a row.

That said, Halloween was great for us O’s. It was Savannah’s first time, obviously, as she’s only 8 months old and was gestating in my belly this time last year (sigh, time is going by too fast). I found Savannah adorable flower costume on ebay (also my new best friend) for $10 total, including shipping. It was the perfect size and in perfect condition. And it beat paying $30 for a nice costume she’ll wear ONCE. Yes, I win.

We just walked around our neighborhood, Mark and I taking turns carrying her. Let me just say that carrying her for a mile between the 2 of us, she got heavy, arms were sore and I’m out of shape. Some people got confused about her outfit and even her gender. Tell me, would you dress up your boy in a pink flower costume? I didn’t think so. Apparently I do, cause apparently I have a boy. She also got confused as wearing bunny costume, which, ya know, I can understand. It was an older man, probably not so great eye sight and her flower pedals could get droopy so only 1 or 2 would stick up. But a boy?

Oh well. We had fun and Savannah racked up some candy for us. I’m excited for next year when she can run around (less tired arms!) and get excited about things. This year she probably had no idea what was going on, but she certainly enjoyed taking in all the new sights and observing all the strange things going on.

Or maybe it was all to much for her, because she was up all night? Oh yes, that was the thrills of teething.

P.S. Check out the sky on Halloween! Quite eerily appropriate, eh? 

Well, a huge milestone (to me) has been added to Savannah’s list of things she can do.

She said “Mama” for the first time today.  She started at breakfast while eating her home made blueberries and apple sauce, and now does it whenever she pleases. Like right now. It seriously brings tears to my eyes every time.

Yes, I know she isn’t directly calling me this yet, but it’s one step closer and just to simply hear those syllables coming from my child, it melts my heart!

With Kaylee, some one else has always been her mama.  I’ve always felt I am a mother, through simply the act of birth, but never as a true Mom.  I’ve never had the role of Kaylee’s mom. Now, it’s my turn to have that title. Oh, these growing up moments are priceless.

Side note: The sleep book arrived today!  I’ve already read half the book, and I’ve learned that my daughter is actually doing well for sleep.  She gets the ‘right’ amount of sleep and naps according to the charts. We already have a routine set. I’ve heard other mother’s horror stores of 12 month olds getting up EVERY hour to nurse still.  Yes, we are doing okay.  That said, there are areas I’d like to work on, like getting her to sleep without nursing or the pacy or rocking. So, we’ll see what the second half of the book suggests :-) At some point I plan to review the whole book on here for others.