A lot of has gone on this past week. Actually, its been only about 5 days of roller coaster emotions.  But really, its been going on longer than I realized.  Are you confused?

I was, too. And shocked.

Savannah has lost some of her hearing. I say lost as if it was simply some of her favorite Strawberry Shortcakes toys dropped at the grocery store, or something. But its not.

It became very noticeable this past month after we all had a bad lingering cold. We were having to repeat ourselves over and over (more so than the normal “selective hearing” kids normally have), make our voices louder and louder for her to hear us. The TV or music had to be blaring loud. She’s always kind of liked her TV and music loud, but this was different. Even her Grandparents noticed something wasn’t quite right and encouraged us to get it checked out, so I did.  Last Thursday she had her hearing tested and was seen by an ENT, who told us that she hears as if she is 10 feet underwater. Everything is muffled. Well no wonder we were always shouting and having to turn things up!

The good news? Its temporary and its just fluid behind the ear drum that has been building up for years (yet amazingly has never been infected, or painful, so we didn’t know there was an issue). The bad news? Oh, by the way, she needs tubes in her ears and her adenoids and tonsils should be taken out, too.  I was shocked, I was expecting an earwax build up (you should see the earwax that runs in the Daddy side of the family!). I cried. I didn’t want my baby hurting. Surgery?! And what do adenoids and tonsils have to do with this? Well, she apparently has huge tonsils that may be causing her some sleep issues like maybe a mild sleep apnea (she does snore…) so they should come out. (I’m still not convinced…)

For those that know me or have been around this blog a while, I like to do things a little more naturally. Especially, ya know, before slicing holes in my child’s eardrums, cutting out body parts, and spending thousands of dollars (no offense to those who have chosen the surgery route, I know it has its purpose and can be a huge help!). But more so than that, I believe in a Great Physician that can heal. I trust that He created our body and its functions for a reason. But, I also trust that if the way He intends to heal Savannah is through surgery, then that’s okay, too.

I felt lead though to try Chiropractic care first. We’ve been seeing one for about a year now, he corrected the migraines and vision issues I had been having daily (Praise God!). I asked if he would help us try to avoid surgery and he said yes….for free. Payment was a concern of mine because, well, Mark is skeptical. I’m lucky I even get to go once a month! Let alone taking Savannah 3 times a week for several weeks to do a series of adjustments for her ears? That would be quite a chunk of money. Praise God for our chiropractor’s generosity and caring. I have peace knowing we have nothing to loose simply in trying a different approach first.

Tonight though, I feel like we got our confirmation from God.  She was adjusted specifically for draining her ears on Friday and again this afternoon (Monday). We hadn’t noticed much a difference in her hearing, though we were told it could take weeks or might not even work at all if it was caused by something else. I got Savannah ready for bed,  turned on her night time music that plays over and over all night long. Its so loud that I can hear it all the way in my room with my door and her door shut.  We snuggled, giggled, talked about her new soccer practice experience, and said our prayers. She then got up to go to the bathroom one last time and something must have happened inside. She looked at me and said, “Mom! Why did you turn the music up so loud?! Its too loud! I can’t sleep like that!”  I flashed a huge smile and said, “Savannah its always this loud.”  I knew in that moment God heard my heartfelt prayers, that Savannah could hear better. Something shifted to drain the fluid naturally. She argued that it wasn’t always this loud even though I assured her that nothing had changed but her ears. After she turned it down to where she wanted it, I asked her if this is how soft she has always heard it and she said yes. She also said the “booming” she’s been hearing in her ears for months that she thought was “monsters coming” had gone, which I’m assuming was the sound of fluid in her ears popping. 2 adjustments, folks. God heard. God answered.

Mark is still skeptical, as I’m sure other people will be, too.  I know this is just the beginning, I accept that surgery could still be in her plans if her second opinion check up still shows fluid in a few weeks. However, I will say, that I have expectant faith that her hearing will continue to get better and surgery will be avoided all together. Its a fine balance between having strong faith that God asks us to have, yet also leaving room for His answer. And that’s why I’m writing this, to document how God works. That He does hear. He does answer…sometimes in the way we ask and sometimes not. I’m ready for that either way.

I also really wanted to share this for the many, many kids I know that doctors are telling them to put tubes in their ears to solve an issue.  I know its not a super major surgery, but its still surgery non-the-less involving emotions, pain, and money. I wanted to share so maybe others might be open to the idea that there are other options out there to pursue before opting for surgery. I used to be a skeptic in chiropractic care, too (looks kind scary watching it be done!). I’m totally a believer now in chiropractic care between this experience and my own issues with migraines that are now non-existent. God totally knew what He was doing when he designed our bodies and I truly feel like chiropractors are tools to keep our bodies in check when we throw them off.

Our story isn’t over, I know. But regardless, God is certainly using this time for some awesome things to bring Him glory. Even if its simply bringing me and Savannah closer to God, or helping Mark (and others) understand why I trust in the things I do, that’s pretty big.

I myself do not have allergies that I know of, but for the sake of Jaxson and his apparent reactions to certain foods I eat transmitted through my milk, I chose to change my diet. It’s been 5 months now since his rashes started appearing and  the frustrations of “What the heck is causing this?!” consumed my mommy life. It’s been quite an adventure and change for us, taking into consideration many people’s opinions from doctors to other mom’s, spending lots of wasted money on ointments, and experimenting with supplemental foods. Back in March at the doctor we pinned down the allergens to be eggs, nuts, dairy, and since then I’ve added soy to the list.

How’s it going, you ask? Well for many months I tried to avoid those foods for his sake, but often failed because of my sweet tooth. Like, when my husband would bring home doughnuts (shame on him to bring home temptation!) or I’d be at a birthday party and sneak a bit of cake. Or, not picking a decent restaurant to avoid cross-contamination, like those cook-in-front-of-you Japanese steak houses where everything is cooked with butter and right next to the eggs for fried rice! So yes, my sweet tooth and eating out has been my biggest challenge. I was getting so frustrated that even though I was “being good” most of the time, he still would have red flared up cheeks that would come and go in intensity.  Get better, get worse, get better, get worse. I would have hope that we finally had it manageable and then I’d sneak another bite of something and make it worse again. Oh, the guilt!

Several times I’ve woken up to Jaxson with blood covered sheets and bright red cheeks, but one day I had had enough. Frustrated with how I had been handling things, I turned to the idea of finding a formula that maybe he would thrive on instead of literally tearing his skin off. Good news? They do make a soy and dairy free formula! Bad news? It costs at least $30 a can, making it over $100 per month. Oy. I like that breastfeeding is free. And plus, the more I thought about it, the more I mourned the idea of losing that special bond between Jaxson and I. I’ve written before how he adores that time, both for hunger and for comfort and quite honestly, I’m not ready to give that up if I don’t need to. Still, that night I nursed him and while doing so I prayed about what God would have me do. I kid you not, the next day his face was at least 50% clearer, when just the day before he had clawed his face over and over.  To me, it was a sign from God to keep trying. So I strapped on my big girl momma boots and determined to try harder.

And, I prayed a lot.

I prayed that God would take away the cravings of the foods that caused him to flare. I prayed that he would purify my milk and the allergens would leave his body. I prayed he wouldn’t itch and scratch. And, I gave thanks that his allergy reactions are just a rash and not anything life threatening like breathing problems (Seriously. Thank you, God!).

I tell you, prayers work! Soon after that my stepmom remembered what she used to do for my little brother when he had eczema (not food related, but same itchy skin situation). We realized that Savannah would eat a PB&J or eat cereal with milk and then kiss all over her baby brother, which easily could pass allergens along. So, I followed her advice of washing his cheeks and hands more often to wipe off any allergens that were lingering on the skin. That made a huge difference! And then, I bought yet another ointment to put on his rash. I’ve tried everything it seems like, natural or not, from Emu oil to paraban laden creams recommended by the dermatologist. Although I would like to find a natural solution, but this Eczema cream with Cortizone has made the most drastic difference.

Of course, I haven’t taken a current picture of him lately except on my cell phone (shame, shame). But, let’s just say he looks kind of like this where the rashes were edited out by an awesome photographer back in May when he was about 6.5 months old:

Minus the frowny face and the froggy hat.

Sure, we have our flare ups every now and then. But, as I stick to my diet for his sake (and improving my own health along the way!) they usually are very small and manageable compared to what the past months have looked like.

Praise God for clear cheeks!

Jaxson is almost 4 months old now (when I started this post he was 8 weeks old!) and has been in cloth diapers almost exclusively for the past 3 months. How’s it going, you ask? Pretty awesome! I am loving cloth diapering and I love keeping extra $40 in my pocket a month not buying disposables!

I had planned to do cloth diapers from the very beginning but with my low iron after birth I didn’t have the energy to walk up the stairs, let alone keep up with diaper laundry. I also quickly learned that prefolds and covers weren’t for me, which were the majority of my newborn stash. I did like kissaluvs fitteds and prowrap covers though! But, I only had 2 so I just used them every now and then. He gained weight and cute leg rolls quickly and at about a month old we (*ahem*…I! Mark hasn’t changed one yet!) eased into cloth. I had enough for 1 day but wanted more so I could go longer between washings.  Mark’s coworkers gave us a  gift card that had more than enough  to double our stash (thanks guys!) from my favorite cloth diaper store Jack Be Natural (excellent customer service and rewards!).

I already had some Bumgenius from my short cloth diapering stint with Savannah, and had bought some Grovia hybrids and a Fuzzibunz, and I liked those, but I decided to try out Kawaii Baby diapers since I heard such great things about them and they are much cheaper! I’m all about getting more for my money. They are extremely similar to BumGenius or Fuzzibunz (depending on which style you get), I love them and are at the top of my favorite list. The Pure and Naturals are the trimmest cloth diaper I’ve used (very close to a disposable fit under clothes), but I prefer to use a fuzzibunz newborn insert to fit the smaller width better (which unfortunately only comes with a Fuzzibunz one size diaper and not sold separately, I looked). I also got some of Kawaii’s Minky Bamboo and they are my favorite for night time since bamboo is super absorbent yet the insert is really thin (and I’ll be honest I am too tired to change his diaper at ever night time feeding, so super absorbency is good!). They also are the softest thing I’ve ever felt.

So to sum things up that I’ve learned or liked about cloth diapering so far:

1. They really do keep in the breastfeeding poo’s better! Every single time he has had a famous baby poo-up-the-back-blow-out has been when he was wearing disposables. In fact, I can only think of maybe 1 or 2 times when his cloth diaper leaked pooped and even then it was only a tiny bit around the leg. I do find that pee will still leak around the legs or sides if I don’t change him soon enough (usually at night when not wearing a bamboo diaper). Still, I remember with Savannah having to treat so many of her clothes or my own sheets for stains at this exclusive breastfeeding stage and I don’t have to do that with his clothes!

2. Washing is easy and no big deal. I do a warm prewash, hot wash with Classic Rockin’ Green or Crunchy Clean, two rinses. Done. Everything goes into the dryer except the shells that I hang on this cool wire rack. Don’t ask me where I got it from, it came with our house. I almost threw it away because I was like, “What in the world would I use this for?!” But it’s perfect for drying cloth diapers inside and not taking up much space so I’m glad I held onto it. Also, our water bill hasn’t gone up much. I’d rather pay a few extra dollars a month in water than even more money on disposables that just get thrown away.

3. Have at least 2 wetbags! (or pail liners if you use a pail.) I use a Planetwise large hanging bag to store our dirty diapers and then it gets tossed in the wash with them. However, until recently I only had 1 bag so while it was washing I was left with a stack of dirty diapers sitting on Jax’s changing area. Granted, they don’t stink at this point because he is only breastfed but still….gross. It’s totally worth the extra money to have another one to keep rotating each wash. Plus, its nice to have a smaller one for your diaper bag when out on the go (which, cloth diapering on the go isn’t so bad either!).

4. He gets diaper rash from when we do use disposable diapers and wipes (which is very rare these days). There’s gotta be something to that! I feel better knowing those chemicals aren’t on him and bothering his skin 24/7.

5. I know some people worry about the “ick factor” of cloth diapers. At this point, its no big deal. I spray a cloth wipe with water, clean him, then shake out the insert into the wetbag. Occasionally, an insert needs help getting out and so I may have to touch a pee filled one but that doesn’t bother me. Right now breastfeeding poo’s are water soluble so no extra step needed, we’ll see how things change once he starts solids in a few months and the poop consistency changes. I know I’ll be investing in or making a diaper sprayer!

I think it is so neat how cloth diapering is catching back on in the parenting world :-) It really is very easy once you stop being overwhelmed by the choices and has so many benefits. I have many mommy friends that have taken the plunge and never looked back!

And…we’re back to baby and birth talk! I had one last thing to share about my birth experience that I think helped me get the birth I desired: Gentle Birth Formula. Since I was induced with Kaylee and Savannah, my midwife suggested I take a supplement as birth neared to help my body prepare itself and hopefully give it a little nudge in the right direction.  I did my research and found this one seemed to have the best results (this forum post was a huge help to read people’s real experiences!) and, of course, got it approved by my midwife before taking it.

So what is it? It’s a mix of herbs that is supposed to help your body prepare for labor. You start taking 1/4th a teaspoon at 35 weeks once a day and then build up to taking it 3 times a day until you give birth (I’ve heard you can take it after birth to help your uterus go back down and help with bleeding as well). However, I didn’t start until 37 weeks and I went straight 3 times day since I was technically full term.  And no, it doesn’t taste horrible since you mix it in a glass of water. I found it easier to take in a small gulp of water rather than an entire glass because it does leave a funky taste if you are constantly sipping on it. It comes in 3 different formulas, I went with the original because I knew Red Raspberry Leaf was great for toning the uterus (and was getting tired of drinking the tea every day!) and I felt comfortable with taking Blue Cohosh because I didn’t have high blood pressure. But, there are two formulas that leave those ingredients out if you need.

While I still went over my due date by a week, I truly think these herbs made a huge difference in my birth experience. Why? Let me count the ways.

This is what Gentle Birth Claims to do:

• Less Pain during labor and delivery
• Advanced Dilation before discomfort was felt
• Shorter and Easier Labor
• Shorter Recovery Time

And how did my experience stack up? Yes, yes, yes, and maybe.

While I certainly felt pain during labor, it never was unbearable. Sure, that could also be because I spent weeks learning how to relax myself and not fear the pain, but I could tell a difference in how the pain even felt compared to  Kaylee’s and Savannah’s labor before I asked for an epidural with them. Like, the fact that I was in full on active labor and then pushing without screaming for an epidural should say something because with Kaylee and Savannah I barely got to 3 or 4cm and I was ready for it. Advanced dilation before discomfort? I’d say so! I was a whopping 6 cm before real labor kicked in, mostly due to the fact that I had weeks of prelabor but each episode of prelabor/false labor that lasted a few hours or less brought me closer to the magic number 10 without much pain. Of course, it was annoying to keep thinking, “This is it! Oh, it stopped.” But, it made progress, I learned something new about labor with each episode, and that made it worth it in the long run.  I also never experienced any of that with Kaylee or Savannah, I had braxton hicks occasionally but I never thought I was in labor or even got past 1cm before going in for my inductions. Shorter and Easier labor? Yup. From the time real contractions started at 5:30pm to Jaxson being born at 10:07pm, it was only 4 and a half-ish hours. Again, this wasn’t like my previous two births where it took 12 hours to get from 1-10 hooked up the pitocin. And obviously, already being at 6cm helped speed things along too. However, my recovery time, while in some ways shorter like postpartum bleeding time and afterpains were much milder, I did have a harder time because I lost so much blood after birth and my iron was extremely low. Once I got my iron boosted back up, I felt much better though physically.

So, that pretty much wraps up my birth experience and what I found helpful in preparing for a natural birth. I definitely recommend this product whether you are seeking a natural birth or not because it does seem to make a difference in preparation to make birth easier. Of course, there are other things you can take or do to prepare your body, like drinking Raspberry Leaf Tea or taking/inserting Evening Primrose Oil and that can be found easier in local stores if you don’t want to shell out 30 some dollars for Gentle Birth. It was worth it to me though :-)

Seriously though, do the research and check with your doctor or midwife first before taking this or anything else.

I can’t believe it…Jaxson is a month old. Where, oh where, does time go?

Things are busy here as you can imagine, lots of diaper changes and feedings, chauffeuring Savannah to school and trying to get out more to see friends. Not to mention Christmas, ah! If you’ve read the past few years, Christmas cards are kinda a big deal to me and I can’t sit down long enough to focus on ordering them. And trying to figure out gifts for all our family? It’s a tad overwhelming!

Actually, life in general has felt overwhelming at times the past month. I definitely had 2-3 weeks of baby blues and it made it hard to enjoy these quickly passing moments. I could handle my job as Mom to Jaxson easily, because I love nurturing, feeding, etc. but I felt like everything else was overwhelming to take care of, including Savannah. Savannah in turn I think fed of off that feeling and was having a hard time…we fought all day long for weeks. I would just cry, feeling like I was failing at being her mother. I haven’t been raising her to act like this, have I?! I felt like I couldn’t effectively be her Mom and give her what she needed (which probably was just more time alone with me and a gentler mother) and didn’t see how we could get back to being in that “grove” we were in before. Both of our routines were thrown off and it was hard! For example, we used to snuggle every night and I would scratch her back before she fell asleep, but I physically could not climb into bed with her after birth since I was recovering or needing to feed Jaxson just as she was able to go to bed. I would become weepy at any time and in general just didn’t feel like myself. I wanted to enjoy this family and life of mine, but it was hard to enjoy anything but taking care of Jaxson.

I also had a really hard time thinking about how my pregnancy and delivery was over. Part of it I know was that it was my focus for months, preparing my body and mind for delivery and suddenly it was done and over. I am certainly happy Jaxson finally made his arrival but I already miss being pregnant! I couldn’t unpack my bag that I took to the birthing center for 2 weeks, I couldn’t think about my midwife or look at my pregnancy clothes without crying. It was strange to me, I hadn’t felt that way about Kaylee or Savannah’s birth. I feel very, very attached to Jaxson’s birth because it was everything I wanted it to be and it is really hard knowing it’s over and perhaps I will never get to experience anything like it again if he is our last child. Finally, what really brought me to my lows of all lows was Jaxson getting his circumcision done at 3 weeks. I struggled with the decision, but it was important to Mark so we did it. I sobbed all day long, hating that I put my little innocent boy in pain for what felt like no reason. Thankfully my sweet friends helped me find peace in the decision, after all, what is done is done! But, after spending all day really crying I woke up feeling like a new person. I think being able to let myself cry, not just weepy little tears, helped me get out all those emotions I was trying to stop from happening (That, and a lot of prayers!). I suddenly felt much more normal and *gasp* happy! And, Savannah has been a new person as well which makes life so much easier. After 3 weeks we began to find our grove again. I still feel like I have a long way to go to really balance this Mom of 2 thing, being a wife, keeping up with laundry and dishes, etc. but it is nice to be in a place of optimism again rather than a dark hole.

As for Jaxson, I’m amazed at how quickly he is growing. He was born at 8 pounds and almost has gained a pound a week since then. Super Momma milk! He outgrew all his newborn clothes within 2 weeks and now is in 3 months, I keep telling him to slow down but he doesn’t listen. Savannah has always gained weight slowly, always wearing the size that coordinated with her age (6 months at 6 months old, etc) so it is strange to have such a quickly growing boy! He is starting to smile at us, it’s a rare occurrence still, but it melts my heart every time. Savannah is thriving in her role as a big sister now that we are getting over some of the jealousy. She loves to help take care of him, she snuggles with us in the mornings, gives him lots of kisses, and even shares her beloved blanky with him. We also are now doing cloth diapers a lot more now that his belly button and circumcision has healed and he has gained some weight so they fit better. I hate prefolds (I feel like I can’t get a good fit and they’re SO bulky), but am loving GroVias and Kawaii’s (shown below) now that he can fit bigger diapers.

Looks just like his Daddy, right?

Jaxson’s pregnancy was different in so many ways, not just because he was a boy and I felt physically different than with Kaylee and Savannah, but because of the care I chose during pregnancy. After two pregnancies with OBGYNs, two hospital births, two pitocin inductions, and two episiotomies I wanted something different. Not just in how I envisioned the birth to be, but in the attention and care I got through the 9 months as well. I did see an OBGYN during the first trimester to ease my fears after losing our twins last year and my visits there only confirmed my desire for something more. Sure, the doctor was nice but I was tired of waiting 45 minutes just to be seen for 5 minutes . Tired of tests I was told I needed to do. Tired of feeling like just a chart and not a person. So, I took advantage of The Pregnant Woman’s Rights and I switched when I felt comfortable that Jaxson was going to “stick” and be healthy in the beginning of my second trimester.

I had actually been researching midwives to use since I found out I was pregnant in 2009 with the twins so I had already decided who I wanted and where I wanted to deliver. My midwife, I’ll call her D, works with a birthing center completely separate from the hospital and only consists of licensed midwives. It took Mark a little while to get used to the idea of not using a hospital for fear of the “what if’s” but once he met D he began to trust her as I did. The birthing center was a stepping stone in a way for us, it was a way to get the completely natural experience I wanted like a home birth would be, but it wasn’t our home (which we both weren’t ready for). The differences between the OB and midwife care was apparent from the very beginning, even back in 2009 when I would email her questions about my miscarriage.

1) I loved that I could email or call her directly if I had questions or needed anything. I called her a million times to  inform her about contractions starting or stopping, to ask about cold remedies, questions about baby movements, my family concerns when I was overdue, etc. 2 weeks postpartum I still call her with concerns about Jaxson or postpartum things. It is so nice to get a quick response and not going through nurses, waiting hours for phone calls back.

2) I have only ever had her for my care and she was there the entire labor/delivery. D was the one who did my prenatal appointments and I knew she would be at my delivery. No doctor rotations, no hoping you get the doctor you like when you go into labor, no doctors popping in and out when its convenient for them, no hoping the nurse you get is a good one. So because I had her for every appointment and through the entire labor we both got to know each other much better than a typical doctor/patient.

3) Which brings me to my next point that prenatal appointments lasted much longer than a doctor appointment. Actually, technically it would be shorter since I practically never had a waiting time to be seen. But, meaning she was checking the baby and we were talking for good 20-30 minutes. I loved there wasn’t a rush in-rush out feel with her, she took her time. And again, having this extra time let me (and Savannah since she came to all my appointments and was often included in checking on the baby) get to know D more on almost a friend level.

4) I had options and could make decisions. In typical OB care, you are told what tests to take when, what shots or blood work you need, what the baby needs after birth, etc. as “preventatives,” regardless of whether you or your baby is at risk for the issue or not.  I loved that since I had no sugar in my urine or any other signs of gestational diabetes, I didn’t have to get the test done!  I also had the choice at 28 weeks if I wanted to get the rhogam shot as a preventative in case I had a car accident or something that would cause my blood to mix with Jaxson’s since I am RH-. Having had two other pregnancies, I thought I needed it or something horrible would go wrong and at first I was going to get it just in case. But honestly, the price of the shot (over $100) made me think twice about it…why spend that money if we don’t need it? D helped me do the research and I asked several professionals their advice and all said it wasn’t needed during pregnancy (even a hospital labor and delivery nurse and a wife to a doctor!). And IF something happened, like a car accident, I still had a window of opportunity to get the shot. In the end, I chose not to get the shot during pregnancy (but needed it after birth and I did take that one) and while it was hard at first to let go of the doctor mentality that something horrible would go wrong…I’m glad I had that choice and glad I made the choice I did.

5) The atmosphere was so much more relaxing! Though the birthing center is in a business building, when you walk in it is very homey. Especially the birthing rooms, they are set up as bed rooms you would have at home with real furniture, dressers, colorful bedlinens, painted walls, curtains, etc. No uncomfortable hospital beds, it was so nice to share a normal queen size with Mark and Jaxson after delivery. I’m sure it was much more comfortable than the hard couch/bed thing Mark had when Savannah was born! The prenatal room was the same way, a twin size bed rather than those hard paper covered doctor tables.  There was also much less people around since the midwives split up their days in the office, so it was quiet even during the day.

6) The attention I got from D in all areas was different. Not just her being there when I needed something, but during visits she asked questions that went beyond what doctors seem to care about. She had me pay more attention to my diet by writing down what I was eating for a week, every visit she asked if I was drinking enough water, she cared about how I was feeling emotionally in the week after birth, she encouraged me to let my self rest and recover after birth (not climb stairs, not get out of bed for 24 hours, etc.) and let others take care of me. Our visits just feel much more in depth and, well, personal. I’m definitely not just a chart number any more.

7) My labor(s) and delivery were what really marked the difference though. Like I said, it was such a peaceful and relaxing environment. The lights could be turned low how I wanted them. I could move into positions that I wanted rather than being stuck in the bed with IV’s. I was encouraged to eat and drink as much as I could rather than being starved with only ice chips to eat, “just in case” I ended up with a c-section. When it came time to push I chose what position felt the best and I was able to be in the birthing pool. The only time D told me to change positions was when Jax was taking a while to fully crown and she knew gravity would help, so I moved from a semi-reclined position to squatting to standing. I also didn’t hear “PUSH PUSH PUSH!” a million times like you hear on TV. D knew my body needed time to breathe Jax down by itself first to prevent tearing so she didn’t encourage me to actually try to push until the very end. She also didn’t do an episonomy like the previous doctors did and let my body tear naturally (which ended up being 2 small shallow tears that didn’t need stitches, much better than episonomy recovery!). I loved that she let my body do what it needed to do rather than forcing it (same for during pregnancy, I would have been hooked up to pitocin or had a c-section after my stalled labor if I was at a hospital).

8) After birth was also a huge difference. After D unwrapped his cord from his neck, he was immediately passed to me and he stayed with me. No rough rubbing to clean him off or make him cry, it was very gentle and calm. We did skin-to-skin contact for hours afterward and we were encouraged to breastfeed as soon as possible (with Savannah she was taken away and it was 3 hours after birth before they brought her to feed!). Jaxson wasn’t weighed until probably 2 hours after he was born, until I was ready to let him be checked out (which is why he popped 3 times before he was weighed, so he probably was more than 8 pounds at delivery). He didn’t get the goopy gunk in his eyes, since I knew I didn’t have STD’s or an infection for him to contract (again with the choices!). Like I said before, all 3 of us were able to rest in one comfy bed and when I was finally feeling some-what better after my blood loss we were able to go home after only 12 hours of arriving the night before.

I could write much more I’m sure, but that’s the gist of the midwife experience I had. Of course, experiences vary from person to person, from different midwives or issues that may come up. For me, it was amazing in every way (even with the frustrations of weeks in prelabor!), from the beginning to present.  I’m so happy with the choices I made and the outcome, I feel much more “complete” in my birthing experience than I did with Savannah. I got the natural approach to pregnancy and birth I wanted, I have a healthy son, and I feel like I’ve met yet another goal of mine. I did it!

Would I do it again this way? Absolutely.

If you’ve read this blog for a while, you may remember when we switched Savannah from disposables to cloth diapers around 2.5 years old.  And I’ll be honest, we didn’t stick with it.  The main reasons why? The stink of microfiber I couldn’t figure out how to keep away, the fact that I lived with my in-laws at the time so it was difficult to keep up with washing when I had to share the washer with 4 other people, and also with me being still in school at the time it just made it difficult to get a routine down. The biggest thing though is that Savannah started to not like them because she could feel she was wet unlike with disposables, which is understandably a big change after 2.5 years in Pampers. She wasn’t ready to potty train yet and so we switched back.

However, with Jaxson’s arrival I’m determined to try again and make it work. Why? The benefits are so worth it for me.  Now that our situation is different, where I am home 24/7, I can wash whenever I need. Also, I’m doing it for the cost savings. We spent about $50′s a month on diapers for Savannah in her 3 plus years in diapers before being potty trained. So roughly 39 months in diapers= $1950 (and that doesn’t include what my in-laws spent for when they watched her, disposable wipes, or diaper genie refills so the number is easily over $2,000). And honestly, one of the main reasons I’m starting from the beginning is for the breastfeeding poop blowouts that occur less often (if ever) in cloth diapers. I remember it was a constant battle and frustration with Savannah in her little Pampers until she started solids. She would poop right through her clothes and onto my lap, my bed, carseat, whatever.  Cloth diapers are just designed better in general, with leg gussets and a tighter fit around the back so hopefully no more  (or at least much less) shooting-up-the-back blowouts will happen! Plus, the fact I’m starting from the beginning with him there is no adjusting or not liking them because it is all he will know. And really? You should feel how soft these diapers are compared to paper disposables. I’ve heard that growing up being able to feel the wetness helps cloth diapering babies to potty train faster, too. If so, bonus! And of course, there are eco-friendly reasons of not throwing out thousands of diapers/wipes in our landfills.

Right now I have about a day’s worth of the tiny newborn stage (during which we will be using some disposables to get past the icky tar like meconium stage) and a day’s worth of larger baby sizes, which means at this point I’ll have to wash each night. My goal is to slowly buy some more once I figure out what works best for us so that I can wash every other day. I’ve decided to use mainly prefolds and covers in the beginning months because I’ve read they hold in the breastfeeding poo’s even better (and fit better on a tiny newborn) than other types such as pockets, plus they are the cheapest way to cloth diaper. When he gains some weight I’ll add in the pocket style diapers like BumGenius, Thirsties, and FuzziBunz.

Aren’t the fun colors so much…well…fun compared to disposables?!

It makes me happy to look at.

This is the whole stash so far, except for my stack of cloth wipes and what I’ve received since taking the picture: 2 newborn fitted Kissaluvs, a Kawaii pocket diaper, a GroVia (which is a Hybrid diaper so we can throw away the inserts to biodegrate when traveling to make it easier!), and a large size hanging Planet Wise Wet Bag to put his dirty diapers in before washing (Thank you again Kelley!).

I have had so many friends switch to cloth, or start from the beginning and have loved it so I’m glad to be surrounded by support and people I can turn to with questions. I’m excited to start this again and to try out different styles or brands unlike last time with Savannah. Mark  just rolls his eyes and is glad he is at work all day so he can avoid this kind of diapering, but I figure if I’m the one home the majority of the time then I can make the choice of what diapers to use :-)

Soap and water? For what? Getting clean?

Nope. Getting rid of ants!

We woke up yesterday to a small ant infestation in our kitchen. This week apparently kept me busy and I didn’t get around to sweeping up those crumbs or getting the dirty dishes put in the dishwasher and they found them.  They also found our dishwasher. Hundreds of them. And to make them worse, they were the biting kind that sting and itch like crazy. Let me just say, they were not welcome in our house. I immediately swept and mopped the floors, hoping to get up any crumbs and food stuck off the floor while Mark was busy squashing and spraying whatever he could get his hands on (what a way to spend Saturday morning, right?).  And that worked…for a little bit. Until we came home and saw even more.  We kept pounding our fist and trying to drown them but a new batch would come right out. Finally out of desperation and not wanting to go to the store to buy chemicals, I searched the internet for natural ways to kill ants.

And it worked.  Who knew something so simple as a few squirts of dishsoap and hot water in a spray bottle would be so effective? They seriously die instantly. Bam. I think it’s the bubbles that trap them or maybe something in the soap that doesn’t agree with them.  Who knows, but it works. And, I’m not afraid to be using it myself since I’m pregnant and even Savannah gets a kick out of spraying them as pay back for all the times they bit her toes outside. We sprayed it in the cracks we knew they were coming from and only a few have ventured out since our attack…and those few were quickly dead whenever we walked by.

Muhahaha! Take that ants.

I think it’s funny how my favorite foods expand as I grow older. I used to not really like broccoli or asparagus growing up, but now they are my favorite veggies with and in just about anything (within reason, of course, like pastas and stir fries or as a side dish to dinner. But, waffles and broccoli? No thanks). Same goes with cheese. I’m still not a huge cheese fan,  I can’t handle a lot at a time like lasagna or certain kinds like ricotta…but I eat a lot more of it in general and try different kinds than I would as child, or more than my own Dad will even now.

My newest discovery? I love spinach. Like, love it. I’ve eaten it just about every day this summer since friends introduced me to ways to eat it that is appealing (the cooked spinach I’ve seen like Popeye? Isn’t so appealing). My obsession started back in May with a spinach basil quesadilla a friend made me along with a homemade strawberry vinaigrette salad with soy nuts.  And, soy nuts? I hadn’t heard of them and normally only like peanuts, but soy nuts are fabulous on a salad!

And then, another friend made a spinach strawberry walnut salad last month with a raspberry vinaigrette. Yes, there is a difference than the one I had in May because it had real strawberries on it, not just nuts, and it was made with spinach leaves rather than lettuce. It took my love to a whole new level.  That is another new thing, fruit on salads never appealed to me until I actually tried it. And surprise! Spinach leaves tastes just like any other darker lettuce and I figure it’s a good way to get the iron I need for my growing boy. And since then, me and my spinach have been best friends for practically every lunch.

Since having my first spinach quesadilla, I’ve been perfecting it to my taste the past few months. My favorite way to make it goes something like this:

-A whole wheat tortilla in a greased pan (I use olive oil spray) on medium heat

-While tortilla is warming, add a light layer of shredded mozzarella cheese

-Break pieces of grilled chicken (I used the pre-cooked strips like Purdue Shortcuts) and fresh basil leaves (we have a plant outside, I wash and use about 3-4 leaves total) and place around tortilla

-Sprinkle of Herbs de Providence, onion powder, and garlic powder (this is what took the flavor the extra step of goodness!)

-Layer of raw spinach leafs (I used the pre-washed bagged stuff)

-A little more basil leaf pieces, another layer of cheese, and a top tortilla.

-Allow to cook until bottom tortilla is a golden brown, then flip and brown the top layer

-When everything is browned and melted perfectly, I use a pizza cutter and start munching!

The Strawberry Salad is super easy:

-Place washed raw spinach leafs in a bowl

-Throw some soy nuts on top (I found mine at Bloom, but I’m sure they would be at a health food store and I’ve heard even Walmart has them)

-Add fresh chopped strawberries (I was out when I took the picture above, sadly. The sweet berries with the sorta-salty soy nut is an amazing combo)

-Add your favorite raspberry or strawberry vinaigrette (I’ve been trying out different store bought ones, right now I’m using Newman’s Raspberry Walnut).

Sometimes I take fresh strawberries and puree them with the raspberry vinaigrette for an even better tastes-like-homemade dressing. I still use this little baby food guy for my puree needs even though we’ve been done with baby food for years. Love it. I’ve also heard people use walnuts, pecans, feta cheese, cranberries, etc. if that’s your thing. That’s what’s great about quesadillas and salads is that it’s so customizable!

And at least I’m craving something healthy everyday, right?

Drink tea.

While I write a paper. Drive to school. Snuggle my little girl (who steals a sip or two).  Eat breakfast. Catch up on blog readings. Read emails . Even while we viewed a piece of land yesterday (!).

I heart tea.

Me and tea, we go way back, and the bonds are everlasting.

And? I can do it guilt free with no caffeine and no sugar. I’ve been using “Ideal” brand Xylitol and love it. It tastes and looks like sugar, but it has zero calaries, low carbs, and no sugar. And, it’s actually good for you, unlike sugar and other artificial sweeteners: it  helps prevent cavities! Plus, it’s cheap.

So, I heart Xylitol as well. I just wish I could buy it in bulk in local stores :-/ More on xylitol later. It deserves it’s own post!